Life,
in general, lends itself to different kinds of experiences. Some of
them are amazing and some of them...not so much. In living with
Gastroparesis for nearly 6 years I have had some absolutely horrible
experiences—Countless trips to urgent care, hospital stays, IV
sticks, blood draws, 24/7 365 days nausea, copious amounts of
medications, side effects of said medications, pill tests (swallowing
pills that BLINK), MRIs, CAT Scans, physical therapy for vertigo
(interesting, but not fun), lost friends, missed opportunities,
missed plans, worried parents. Oh, and the vomiting, can't forget
that. These are experiences that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy—if
I had one.
But
I have also had some of the most AMAZING opportunities along
the way and they FAR outweigh the unpleasant ones. I've gotten
to interpret for the Deaf at Angel's Stadium twice, go to a taping of
The Ellen DeGeneres Show, go camping in the Big Bear Mountains twice,
go 4x4ing in Big Bear and Death Valley, go hiking several times, do
science experiments, go cosmic bowling, make friends, have parties,
and SO much more. These are experiences that I will NEVER
forget and, though I may not have been feeling top notch during any
one of those given activities, they are mine to cherish because I
didn't allow my disease to take it away from me.
The
question still lingers though: has Gastroparesis entering my life
changed me? The answer is simple...No...Yes. Deep down inside, I am
the same sarcastic, goofy, happy, silly—I'm flattering myself
here—person that I have always been. If you set yourself up to have
something sarcastic said to you, rest assured, I will not hesitate to
fling a sarcastic remark right at you—and I don't even have to know
you! I have always been a good listener, willing to take the time to
stop whatever I'm doing and help a friend in their time of need, to
lend advice if it's wanted.
But,
by the same token, Gastroparesis has changed me in that I probably
talk about barf a little bit more than a proper lady should and how
bloated I am after eating so very little and how that is ENTIRELY too
much food on my plate (I can barely manage a few crackers anymore). Mentally, I think
about where all of the bathrooms are between Point A and Point B, but
rest assured, I am not above throwing up in an alley or on the side
of the street! I have to daily decide the simplest of things...should
I make my protein shake or just drink a ready-made one? Should I
carry medication with me today or will I be fine? Is that enough
water or do I want to deal with carrying more? I also didn't have to
stop and think “should I take a Zofran (an anti-nausea/anti-emetic
medication) before I eat or will I be alright this meal?”These are
things that, prior to 2010, I never gave a second thought to!
Gastroparesis
has changed me. But I am still the same.
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