Domperidone...Again

Yesterday I trooped back in to see my surgeon, Dr. Marrujo, to be checked up on as far as my health goes. Since having Alfred--my pacemaker--turned off in February, I've slowly gone down hill, though it's really just been in the last six weeks that it's been really noticeable. We discussed the fact that my bloodwork came back normal--no real shocker there--and what the next step should be. 

Domperidone. 

I've taken this medication before, albeit, about five years ago, and it didn't do anything for me except make me feel weird. Since, five years ago, I had to get it from Canada and it wasn't necessarily regulated properly, I'm going to be seeing a Dr. Lim who is running a trial here at Kaiser to see if, with the proper dosage, it does what it's supposed to do. 

Like most any other person with a Chronic Illness I'm like "great ANOTHER medication". You really just want to be done with everything, if I'm totally and completely honest with you. You get incredibly tired of having medications upon medications in your nightstand and being in different trials and it getting you nowhere. 

I. Am. Just. Tired. I'm not giving up! I'm just tired. I'm sick of losing weight and gaining weight and losing it again. I'm sick of my hair dying. I'm sick of the dry skin. The insomnia. The body pain. It's just a lot to handle when all I want to do is help other people. That's what I LOVE to do. I want to help others, not be helped and it sucks. 

Pity party over. 

So now I wait for Dr. Lim's office to call me so that I can meet with him to make sure that I qualify. Then, I guess, I will start Domperidone...again.